


Squirrels in Love

by CllrNat



Series: Gin soaked sagas [3]
Category: Holby City
Genre: F/F, Gin soaked, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-30
Updated: 2019-05-15
Packaged: 2019-06-18 20:04:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 12,513
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15493629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CllrNat/pseuds/CllrNat
Summary: The girls plan their first date after a certain soldier received medical attention.What could possibly go wrong?





	1. First Aid

As they continued to stand on the branch staring into each others eyes, Squirena motioned with her tufted ears and a raised right eyebrow for Squernie to move herself and enter her dray.

The place was homely and quaint but sparsely furnished; it was decorated with an assortment of dried flower petals, nutshells and translucent insect casings, reflecting the sunlight that shone through the knot hole into assorted colours that suited the red down to a tee.

Squernie was shown to a seat in the centre of the room and relaxed into it while Squirena set about checking her out, in more ways than one, if you get my drift. As her hands wandered over the exquisite white fur in an attempt to check and clean the wounds, her eyes wandered all over the toned, muscular body sat before her and quivering under her hands with every touch. Her knees turning to jelly as she fantasises about frolicing up and down her tree trunk with the Cosmic White sat before her.

Squirena wasn’t exactly sure why she was so instantly enamoured by this other squirrel, was it that new sap she had been drinking earlier? She had bought a new vintage of Squiraz from over in the next County, had they spiked it with fermented woodlouse, they wouldn’t do that to a Squiraz would they?

As her mind wandered, her hands began to slow their pace and Squernie was staring right at her face, wondering what exactly was going through that gorgeous head of hers.

Shaking her bountiful tail, the shiver ran right up her body bringing her out of her trance and noticing those golden eyes boring right into her, as if she could see directly into her mind and know exactly what she was thinking.

Breaking their contact, Squirena went to her cupboard at the far edge of the dray where she kept her supplies of lavender oil, spider silk and pine needles, to name just a few of her medical items; these were just the ones she used on the white to repair her injury and prevent any infection.

Once Squirena had finished her ministrations of the Army Squirrel, she became a tiny bit nervous in her presence and chirped up, ‘all finished Major.’

Squernie carefully stood up, rolled her powerful shoulders and flexed her muscular arms to see how the injury would prevent movement. To be honest, the work Squirena had done on her was top notch, no complaints from her about anything whatsoever, she finally stretched her tail to its full length to see if that had any restrictive movements but all she could hear was a groan emitted from behind her. 

Squirena just stood still with her hand clasped over her pretty little mouth, she couldn’t believe she had let that slip. What would Major Squernie think of her?

It was certainly not the sort of groan you could mistake for anything else other than what it was, bringing a wide grin to Squernie’s face. She had well and truly struck The Golden Acorn here, so she decided to go all out and try, why not, nothing ventured, nothing gained as she has always been told. She can get one of two answers; yes or no. If no she’s lost nothing, if it’s yes then she has hit the jackpot.

Turning to face the stunned red, a broad grin on her features she just took a deep breath and asked, plain and simple:

‘Dinner?’

‘My place?’ Squirena responded.

‘Later? Sundown?’

‘OK’ the response was said with such a breathy response, Squernie’s white fur almost turned pink.

Ever the galant squirrel, Squernie took Squirena’s paw, lifted it to her lips and pressed them softly to the delicate fur in front of her.

‘Until later, nurse Nightingale’ and with that she turned and bounded out of the dray, along the tree limb and threw herself head first in through the skylight of the barn and just like that was gone.

Now, when she said nurse Nightingale, she was actually referring to the World Famous Nurse Squorence Nightingale, just in case you were wondering.

Squirena just stood there staring from her hand, to the barn and back again, the sensation of those lips were burnt into her flesh, or it flipping well felt like it to her. Meanwhile her free hand clutched at her throat and the necklace she always played with in times of stress.


	2. Who are the Squirrels of Peace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Squernie goes in search of her platoon and finds more than she bargained for.

Chapter 2

As Squernie dropped down into the twilight brightness of the barn, she imagined herself and Squirena having a play and frolic in there sometime; hiding amongst the leaves, rolling in the hay and chasing each other over the beams to get themselves all ……… pay attention Squernie, there are rats and owls in here remember. She shook her white fur from tips of her ears to the end of her tail to pull herself back to reality, then looked around into the quiet, gloom.

Where were her platoon? It seemed a little quiet for a war zone. She heard noises in the distance and ran all out in that direction ready to throw herself into the frey. However, when she arrived at the spot, she saw some movement out of the corner of her eye, so she began to slow down, but she was too late, she had been seen. 

The scene was not what she imagined it would be.

Sat in a circle were her platoon on the one side, rats on the other and an assortment of various types of squirrels were surrounding them all, talking to them in quiet voices. 

A tall, stocky, fluffy grey, slightly larger than all the others stepped forward and instantly Squernie felt relaxed in his company.

‘Good Morning Major, so kind of you to join us on this fine day. Please take a seat’ as he signaled with his paw to an empty area at the edge of the circle, obviously saved for her. ‘My name is Squasha, and we’, as he indicated his scurry of assorted squirrels, ‘are the Squirrels of Peace.’

A scurry (or a dray, also a dray refers to the nest of a squirrel) is a collective noun for a group of squirrels, just in case you didn’t know that. There were reds, greys, blacks, flying and ground squirrels in this scurry.

The whole group jumped together and raised their paws in a two fingered peace signal to everyone, squeaking loudly ‘Peace out squirrels.’ 

Squernie chuckled to herself as they reminded her of a scene from Squarlie’s Squirrels with Squarrah Fawcett, Squaclyn Smith and Squate Jackson in the 70’s.

Squasha went on to inform her that they, collectively her and the soldiers under her command, were not his prisoners, but until everyone began to be nice to each other, then no-one was leaving this barn. 

Ordinarily Squernie wouldn’t care about not leaving, as she enjoyed, no in fact she loved barns. But not tonight, no, tonight she had made plans with a most delectable squirrel and she did not want to let this amazing opportunity pass her by. 

Images of a flirty Squirena flashed before her eyes and she went all warm and squidgy inside. 

Squernie also heard some noises overhead, she had failed to notice this at first, but the Barn Owls were also in attendance, with flying squirrels clinging to their backs via harnesses they had obviously applied to stop the owls escaping and agreeing to this meeting.

Squasha proceeded to speak, ‘now that everyone is here, shall we begin?’  
Squernie just hoped he would get on with it and let them all out so she had time to attend her dinner with Squirena. She then began to daydream because let’s face it, Squasha seemed lovely, but by god he was boring.


	3. Daydreaming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Squirena is daydreaming and planning for her date night

Chapter 3

Squirena was lazing in the delightful, afternoon sunshine, soaking up the rays as she dreamt about later and what she was going to cook for the delicious Squernie. 

Oh god, she meant what delicious food was she going to cook for Major Squernie.

What did she have in the larder? 

She had a few quail eggs, a grasshopper, an acorn or two and some slow-worm jerkie. 

Squirena could eat her soldier as a picnic sat on a leaf with some water and a nice vintage from her store cupboard. 

Oh god, not again. They could eat the food she prepared sat together on a picnic leaf with some water and a nice vintage from her stock of Squiraz. That’s better, get your mind out of the compost heap woman.

Meal sorted.

Contentment and arousal settling throughout her ear tufts and tail, she hummed in a perfectly contented way. Nothing sensual in the sound at all, phaa who was she kidding, it was a total turned on hum and she hadn’t felt this way since she was a young kitten. 

What the squirrel-dee-doo was going on with her mind?

As she relaxed on her branch with a glass of Squiraz and continued to daydream; her dreams kept revolving around a certain Cosmic Squirrel (again) who was continually staring, deeply into her eyes. 

Once again, as in previous dreams, Squirena ends up finding those golden globes so full of passion, vitality and playfulness but most definitely, flirty.

She lounged there on the soft moss covering the bark, filing her nails, just so they weren’t too long or too sharp for later; a tiny amount of sharpness never hurt anyone in her opinion, especially to have a good old scratch, but not too much or she might just scare the Major away. 

She didn’t think she would though, the BMAS did not seem the type of squirrel to scare easy but you never know do you, she just had to reign her over-confidence in a little, that was until they actually got to know each other better.

If Squirena had any faults it was her desperation to do things too fast, too perfect and to get herself overexerted, she worried too much, oh, and she was so brutally honest with people it sometimes pissed them off. 

Well, most of the time really, not just sometimes, hence her living alone, because other squirrels did not always appreciate her candidness. She tried to tell herself she didn’t care but deep down she did, who the hell truly wanted to be lonely, especially when you could have some total stud-squffin living in your dray with you.

Right, what should she wear? 

Should she dress herself up or should she just remain ‘au naturel’, what would Squernie prefer? 

She believed Squernie would prefer her just as she was, no extra frills or airs and graces, she presumed the Major was not fickle minded like other squirrels she knew, or she thought she wouldn’t be. 

How could she assume that when she had only just met her.

Squirena was an efficient planner, organiser and entertainer. She had confidence in abundance and enjoyed socialising but had never been attracted to another female before. 

Entertaining was entertaining wasn’t it?

It didn’t really matter what sex ……..mmmmm sex, bugger, what sex they were, she could flirt for Squirreldom, but did she want anything more from this or was it just infatuation?

It’s just that this Cosmic White intrigues and captivates her every waking (and sleeping) moment. 

She reaches behind her for her i-squad and typed in Dream Interpretations concerning squirrels and the colour of said squirrel; she was astounded to find that dreaming of a white squirrel means perseverance. 

Wow, does this means she needs to persevere with her infatuation of this Cosmic White? 

No problems there, she had no intention of letting this one slip away, oh no, none whatsoever.


	4. Formulating a plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Squernie plans an escape

Chapter 4

Squernie was so bored stiff with this fiasco now and her arse was getting numb from sitting in one place for far too long, listening to Squasha droning on and on about peace and love. 

They’d probably all been up Twmbarlwm Mountain eating Magic Mushrooms by the looks in their eyes.

She totally understood Peace and Love; just because she was a soldier, she wasn’t a warmonger, Squernie didn’t think he realised she was in the medical corps and was only following and coordinating these soldiers, just in case of a rat bite or some flipping owl swooped down and dragged them off. 

Pot, kettle, black went through her head. 

Squernie was a typical squirrel, the idea that there are obstacles which cannot be overcome is not part of her outlook on life. Everything had an answer; all problems have a resolution or they wouldn’t be a problem now would they. 

Squasha and his dopey bloody Squirrels for Peace, had somehow kidnapped them, how the heck did this bunch of Squippies outsmart a Scurry of Squirrels, a Plague of Rats and a Parliament of Owls.

Never one to give up Squernie was quietly devising a plan, totally determined on getting out of here. She was going to make her date with the delectable Squirena, whatever she had to do to get out of here she would do it.

A Cosmic White Squirrel was stubborn and contrary, they also have that typical Boy Squout mentality throughout their whole life; ‘Be prepared for anything’. 

They have that bloody minded perseverance and the confident readiness to try different methods to ensure they hold all the keys to success. 

You only have to watch YouSqube to see the Big Macho Army Squirrels taking part in the Squirrel Assault Courses, Mission Squimpossible and Iron Squirrel, to see the complete and utter determination of our furry species. 

Squernie had competed in many of these in her youth, her favourite competition being Mission Squimpossible with her analytical mind acquired through her job as a trauma squrgeon. 

She loved the assault courses and was planning one as her escape, all while Squasha waffled on and on, she relished her job as a world renowned Squergeon.

She had written many articles, papers and invented techniques that were now regularly used around the globe. She had a very bright mind for solving things on her paws and adapting on the spot.

Using her nail to tap on the seat she was sat on, she looked around to see if any of the others were paying attention or recognised Squorse Code.

Oddly enough she noticed that Squetch and Squom understood her, a few of the rats clicked recognition and a couple of the Barn Owls hooted the standard response. Squernie smirked her trademark smile, instantly noticed by the big softy still talking.

Squasha stopped his narrative and looked around, he was far from stupid and knew something was going on but couldn’t quite put his paw on it. 

Everyone just stopped what they were doing and chillaxed a little while the Squirrels of Peace paced around, not quite as zened out as they attempted to portray. 

Probably getting paranoid after coming down off the mushrooming and suddenly acting all twitchy. 

Squernie just leant back all nonchalant and tried to give an outward appearance of boredom, all the time making eye contact with her now accomplices; be they Squirrel, Rat or Owl.

A plan was forming in between those lovely little tufts, she just had to put it in to action and let the others know.


	5. Squirena gets ready for her date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Squirena prepares and daydreams about her date

Chapter 5

Meanwhile back at her tree, Squirena still had the majority of the day to kill; oh what to do? she couldn’t drink anymore Squiraz or she would be totally squiffy, ha notice what I did there?

Well she could drink more obviously but then she wouldn’t be fit for anything later and she had plans flying through her head. Boy did she have plans for later and none of them were less than explicit.

She had just received a message on squessanger via her i-squad from her nephew, Squason (god that was a mouthful) who was obsessed with Iron Squirrel. He had sent her a link with a new upload and implored her to watch it immediately, why, she didn’t know, but she was always ready to humour him, bless him, due to his little peculiarities.

Squason always seemed to have this way of knowing what she was thinking, it disturbed her sometimes, recently she didn’t know when she wasn’t disturbed, but she loved him to bits so was always ready to give him a few minutes of her time if it meant he was humoured.  
The first thing she noticed as she downloaded the video was that the squirrel involved was WHITE, this immediately caught her attention and her imagination went off on a nice, dreamy tangent. Her ears twitched as sound came from YouSqube, Earth calling Squirena and she shook herself from tip to tip.

Turning up the volume she realised they were introducing Squernie, her Squernie, well soon to be her Squernie if she had her way; she was the current Iron Squirrel Champion, so of course she was obviously going to have to watch those rippling muscles and that twitching tail over and over again, immediately her pulse rate increased to the point she almost had squalpitations. 

She found out that the white was a world renowned Trauma Squergeon. Small world really, since Squirena hadn’t let on to the other squirrel that she was a Vascular Squergeon, at least they had something in common for the conversation front anyway, but hey, who was interested in talking.

Ok, enough of that or she would be sat here ogling the white all day and get absolutely nothing done.

She thought about calling Squicarus and going to the shops in the next field, because she had heard of this new thing called Squoffee, not something a squirrel would be interested in normally, the smell making most of the species quite sick but it was an acquired taste.

She had heard a lot of the military had become Squoffee drinkers, due to the squaffeine or some such thing helping to keep them awake during military exercises. 

Squirena had an acquired palate too so why not, let’s push the acorn out as they say in some circles.

She whistled like a navvy to summon the pigeon, which was surprising for a squirrel of such refinement, or so others thought. Little did they know that Squirena was not quite as refined as all that. 

She liked the basic stuff of life if she were totally honest, which she rarely was with herself and loved to revel in her own desires, needs and pleasures, not something she would make public knowledge, but as her good friend, the femme fatale Squian always told her ‘a little bit of what you fancy does you good’, and boy oh boy did she fancy Squernie, but not just a little bit. 

She fancied having the Cosmic White soldier in her Dray, in her nest, in her shower, against her door, everywhere she could think of really, in every which way possible. Odd for someone who had never fancied or fantasised about another female squirrel before. 

She heard the flapping of wings approaching so slipped her scarf and flying goggles over her perfectly formed head and wandered to the end of the branch ready to mount the bird.

She whispered her destination into the pigeons ear and they immediately took off. Their flight path took them directly over the barn and she leant to the side to see if she could look in through the skylight and be nosy. Looking to see if she could catch a glimpse of white, god you are obsessed squirrel she thought to her chattering mind, what do you bloody expect she tells herself, you’ve seen the BMAS for yourself, come on ……… total irresistibility.

What she does see confuses her so much she almost fell off Squicarus. She saw a circle of squirrels, rats and owls sat down and surrounded by an assortment of the family Sciuridae, not just arboreal, but some of our ground and flying relatives too. 

Amazing really, they were never normally all gathered in one place. 

Odd was the main thought that flashed through her Squernie obsessed mind as she saw a flicker of white sat in the midst of it all. 

As they flew over the barn, their shadow must have caught Squernie’s attention, because she suddenly saw the white lift her head and as they made eye contact she had to grasp on to the birds neck, the intensity of that stare sent shockwaves right through her entire being.


	6. The Escape

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Squernie plots and enacts her escape, all to get to Squirena

Chapter 6

Squernie saw the movement above her and as she tilted her head back to look at what was up there, her eyes met those of the drop dead gorgeous Squirena, sitting atop a bird. 

Blinking in amazement, she was stunned to see a squirrel riding a pigeon and her mouth dropped open for a second, while her golden eyes firmly fixed onto those almost black ones of her soon to be paramour or lover, if she had her way. She very much hoped she’d have her way later, if she played her nuts right.

That sight gave her the impetus to get a move on and get out of here, well that and the incessant droning of Squasha’s voice too. 

Using her military tacticians brain she surveyed her surroundings and plotted the escape route, just as she would for competing in the Iron Squirrel, to enable her to get herself out of there. 

If she had to leave her troop behind while she went for reinforcements so be it, but she hated the idea of this, especially when their motto was ‘never leave a squirrel behind’.

She tapped out her plan to the others in Squorse Code and received affirmatives from all involved, she could then call her trusty steed, the flighty Squagon Fly, Fleurticus to take her and bring the regiment to the rescue of the others.

On the tap of three everyone moved as one coordinated group; surprising the Squirrels of Peace, creating total confusion and permitting Squernie to make her planned escape. 

The rats bit ankles, the owls spun their heads 180 degrees and just stared at their stunned riders, who we unable to move swiftly what with the restrictive limitations of their membranes, the squirrels kicked out with their back feet and tails, then chaos ensued.

The whole barn looked like a scene from Kill Squirrel 3, you know that film by the famous squirrel film Director, Squentin Tarantino.

Copying Squma Thurman, well no just being herself really, but let’s just imagine it for fantasy sake, as Squernie back flipped her way up to the rafters, jumped over the beams with her long muscular back legs and swinging from her powerful tail, until she was finally out through the skylight and running along the roof before those below had even realised she was out of there.

She raised her fingers to her lips, took a deep breath and blew. The sound was like a scream, a very high pitched blood curdling, annoying scream to be honest, and almost instantly she heard a responding roar coming from near the river, when she saw little puffs of smoke rising as her Squagon Fly steed answered her summons and made her way quickly towards her.

Fleurticus roared out a greeting to her rider, this sound did things to your saliva glands much like someone dragging their nails down a blackboard or when you are sucking a copper penny, if you were stupid enough to do either. 

Squernie was immune to this awfully annoying sound, possibly something she was born with as a Cosmic Squirrel, a built in tolerance of all things loud, antagonist and squeamish. 

Hence her having Fleurticus as her steed; what with her flaming nostrils and that accent, wow that god awful accent made Squernie want to wrap something around her mouth to prevent her from talking, but then she would get done for Squagon cruelty and the Steed Squnion would be on her back, rather than the other way around.

She wasn’t so young not to have heard about Squarthur Squargill and his destruction of inter-animal relations, he had almost created another World War with his strikes. Animals starving and losing their riverbank homes, being unable to feed their little ones, while he lost nothing. Anyway, enough about him.

She jumped on Fleurticus’ back and radioed to the barracks, sending her coordinates for reinforcements to come and rescue the others. Leaving her now free to go and get herself ready for her date night. 

She directed Fleurticus to take her home so she could get ready for her dinner date with Squirena later.

What should she take as a gift? Squiraz? Acorns? Squampagne? Fruit?

Yes, Squampagne and Strawberries went really well together. Plus if she got really lucky tonight she’d be feeding the red some strawberries while drinking and lying under the stars.

She’d be able to point out the star she was named after; Berenice the bringer of victory.


	7. Preparing for their date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Preparing for their date and arriving at Chez Squirena

Chapter 7

Squirena made it back in plenty of time from Squarrods, with a bag of freshly roasted, finely ground, Sqoffee beans and a squaffitiere to make it in. 

Squicarus had left immediately upon depositing his rider to return to his young family, sent along with presents for his children, love from Aunty Squirena.

Food was all prepared, drinks now chilling, seating arranged all very ‘intimate’ exactly to Squirena’s requirements, her clothing, what there was of it, was all laid out ready. 

Noting the time on her daisy clock, she was able to have a luxurious shower and do her makeup all before Squernie was due to arrive. She paced the tree bough, palms sweating while counting the minutes before the white arrived. 

Squernie had made it home to the barracks in record time, Fleurticus wasn’t the lead Squagon Steed for no reason, that Gaelic heritage had reared Champions on the Grand Squational circuit over the decades of Anglo French relations. 

Fleurticus chose the military route rather than the grandstanding of competing in races. She had been awarded the Welsh Squagon Medal for gallantry, every Squagon Fly wanted that honour, to be honoured like the Welsh Dragons of old, after whom they are named. 

She couldn’t have a better rider than the Cosmic White, Squernie, she felt so honoured to have been chosen by her. She sat on the branch outside her dray as she listened to the white humming tunes of such happiness as she showered.

She liberally applied acorn oil to her fur and gave herself a thorough brushing from tip to tail, ensuring no knots remained and her fur soft and silken to the touch. She had no intentions of being less than perfection tonight. 

Spraying herself with Sq’eau de Jasmine, Squernie inhaled the scent which relaxed her ready for the hopefully enjoyable nighttime ahead of her. 

Picking up the Squampagne and Strawberries she’d taken a detour to Squarvey Nic’s for, she checked herself out in her mirror, not that she was vain in the least, but she just wanted to ensure she was perfect in every way for the beauty she intended to woo tonight. 

She then stood tall, pulling her shoulders back and with head held high strutted out to her waiting steed. Fleurticus lowered herself as much as she could, so Squernie didn’t have to stretch to mount her and disturb her perfectly squaffed fur.

The flight was leisurely and unrushed, they both enjoyed the short journey to Squirena’s tree. Fleurticus approaching carefully and parallel hovering alongside the jetty, Squernie dismounted with a gift in each hand, a spring in her step and the widest, happiest grin on her angular fluffy face.

Squirena came out of her dray, just as the white alighted on her tree and she watched in amazement at the Squagon Fly who was nuzzling Squernie before zipping off. Both squirrels chuckling in union as they listened to Fleurticus singing in French, a love song meant for both of them as she went away to visit her family for the evening.

Squernie turned 180 degrees on the spot and stopped, totally stunned at the amazing sight before her very eyes. Her knees almost gave way as lust drove a spear of desire right through her core. No one, and I truly mean no one has ever had this effect on the white before, EVER. 

She gulped as her throat went instantly dry, basically because Squirena was bloody yummy looking, boy she wanted to devour her like a ripe hazelnut, there and then. 

Squirena gazed directly into her golden eyes and smirked at her, those dark eyes of hers were twinkling with total wickedness, as if she was reading her mind.

‘Shit’ thinks Squernie, did I just say that aloud?

But as Squirena’s not responding to her, that’s a big fat no then.

‘Hello again’ says Squirena in the huskiest voice she’d ever heard from a squirrel before.

‘H...Hi, ….. these…. are….for… you’ as she thrusts the gifts straight at the red squirrels chest. A totally beautiful chest if she must say, her eyes totally transfixed to the area. 

She felt a slender, manicured finger gently lift her chin up, so that their eyes met. 

‘Thank you for the gifts and you can look at those (indicating her chest) all you like later. If you wish.’

Squirena took the gifts inside and placed then in her squidge to keep chilled for later.

Squernie stood there like she did the first day of school, not knowing what to do, what to say or where to go. If I wish, if I wish, what do you bloody think, of course I wish and not just to look either. 

As rampant thoughts rushed through her mind, well she was a typical soldier after all, she thought of way more things and bet Squirena had a trick or two up her tail. 

Squirena came back outside, she took Squernie’s paw tenderly in her own and planted a gentle kiss on her cheek. 

Pulling her over to the prepared area, she directed Squernie to make herself comfortable on the cushions laid out before them, around the leaf that had their meal on, in the light of the glow flies.


	8. Getting there

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Squernie finally arrives  
> Squirena is all ready

Chapter 8

Initially they both just sat there staring longingly into each other’s eyes and picking at the tidbits displayed before them, Squirena delighted in shocking the white by leaning across and feeding her, sharing some of the delightfully tender pieces; Squernie ate a quail egg, shared some grasshopper, ate an acorn or two and tried some slow-worm jerkie, she’d never eaten that before and it was chewy, earthy, chewy and just a little bit more chewy, but quite delightful really, including the chewy bit, it most definitely gave her jaw some exercising. 

However, it was not quite the form of exercising she was interested in, aye aye she thought smirking, the red picking up on her thoughts and responding in kind. 

All washed down with ice cold spring water, brought up from the stream behind the tree and sipping some exquisite squiraz, a superb vintage, untainted by fermented woodlouse as so much seems to be lately.

‘Would you like some dessert before it gets too late?’ 

‘Too late for what?’ she asks raising her delicate eye whiskers in that way that has Squirena’s stomach churning, in a good way, not the puking up way. 

In the way it feels when you swallow a live butterfly or moth and it flutters around in your guts, obviously until it dies but hey ho, that’s live food for you.

‘Why, to eat of course, what did you think I meant?’ as she rolls those twinkling eyes and lightly touching the white on her forepaw, smiling coyly, knowing exactly what she was intimating at, but enjoying the flirting as much as Squernie was.

These squirrels were as bad as each other they were suddenly beginning to realise. 

Oh boy, they were in for quite a ride if this worked out as they both expected it to. They stared for a little time and it felt as if time stood still, until Squirena broke the contact by removing her paw, leaving Squernie craving for her touch.

‘Oh I most definitely have every intention of eating well tonight Squirena’, Squernie says quite forcefully, as she stares longingly at the red’s luscious mouth, painted with crimson berry juice to match the colour her carefully manicured nails had been painted. 

Squernie raised her whiskers a little at the sight, she knew those nails weren’t that well tended and short earlier, because she had made a note of inspecting those gorgeous paws. Ding Dong was her next thought.

‘I would love to feed you those strawberries soaked in Squampagne, if you’d let me.’

As Squirena excitedly made her way inside to gather the dessert, Squernie decided to make the seating arrangements even cosier and more intimate than they were already. Making sure they were sat as close as possible, you could barely get an oak leaf between them.

This part was her forte, she was a perfect seductress, had plenty of practice actually. It was amazing how many squirrels ostracised the Cosmic White’s but there were far more who wished to experience the delights they offered in the confines of the drey, if you get my meaning, you do, oh good, then I don’t have to elaborate much then do I.

Just as Squirena was the most perfect flirt, she got her way with both male and female squirrels (actually they are meant to be called ‘a boar’ and ‘a sow’ but that’s too close to talking about pigs, and these beautiful specimens are far from looking like pigs now aren’t they) by flirting for squirreldom, never going further but just enough to get what she wanted. 

They both wanted each other much deeper than all their past seductions and flirts, they were a match made in heaven. Together they could make the stars collide and the tree roots shudder.

As Squirena went quickly to her larder to fetch the dessert, she stopped to check herself out in the mirror, she looked stunning if she said so herself, but she didn’t have to because Squernie was saying all the right things, at just the right time. God that white knew exactly what she was doing and Squirena was caught; hook, line and sinker.

Squirena flushed a little, thankfully her red fur covered the colour underneath and she hurried to grab the items and get back outside to ‘Squernie’ she thought the last word with such a sigh and smile it seemed to stretch on for ages in her head.

Oh god how old are you, you silly old kitten, your acting like a newly weaned kit taking their first steps into the big wide world outside, all excited and desperate to explore the unknown.

Well, it is the unknown to her, she has never had feelings for another female squirrel before. 

Apart from the kit in Squepney a while ago when she was visiting family, but nothing ever came of that and it was just a childish crush. 

This….. Well this……. She knew exactly what she was doing, what she was letting herself in for, she was an adult, time was passing and she desperately wanted passion, hot sweaty, mind blowing squex and she realised that Squernie would definitely be able to give her that.

With that mouth, oh that small desirable mouth, those arms, paws, those tufted ears, that tail omg that tail, oh sod it, with those …… EVERYTHING. This squirrel was everything she has wanted in such a long time and had dreamt about nothing else for month.

She knew Squernie was her Squestiny.

She grabbed the bowl of strawberries, picked up the bottle of squampagne and swished her hips seductively as she sacheyed her way out to enjoy the remainder of her night.


	9. Squate Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Its squate night for our two fluffiest tufties; Squirena and Squernie get their girl.  
>  Squampagne and Strawberries This leads to story 4 - Squide

Chapter 9

Squernie was lounging back on the pillows, all nonchalant and oozing sexual confidence, she was far from either, well always sexually confident but at this precise moment in time not, she was however able to put on such a show she fooled everyone, even Squirena for a moment, but only for a moment.

Squernie had seduced many a willing female, but had never truly wanted or desired any of them as much as she did this red stood directly in front of her. Her pulse was so loud in her own ears and her breathing was so quick she almost squyperventilated. 

The red only had to look into her golden eyes to note the terror lurking deep within her. This white was actually terrified of what was about to happen, just like her, not so cocky and confident then Major hmmm?

At this thought the red decided to play her at her own game, she relaxed and sat down very slowly next to the white, ensuring they were so close they felt each other breathing. 

She heard Squernie’s breath hitch as her fur brushed over the whites arm and side, then again as she turned herself sideways on to face the soldier.

‘So, a ripe hazelnut am I?’ Squirena murmured near the whites tufted ear, she thought she’d left it long enough before teasing the nervous white lying before her.

Squernie’s ears twitched so hard they almost hit each other, she was about to fly off the cushions and looked everywhere except at the deity before her. Squirena lay her perfectly manicured paw gently upon Squernie to calm her down. 

‘Relax Squernie please.’

Squirena was well known for her flirtatious ways amongst those that know her, unfortunately Squernie doesn’t, but it does help to ease the tension of the normally squaciturn Officer and BMAS. 

Both of these normally over confident squirrels were scared, however, they tried to relax and just enjoy this feeling of togetherness and learning to know each other. 

Surprised they were both involved in the same career of squergery, the conversation began to flow as they relaxed and became their usual confident selves. 

Squernie reached for the plumpest looking strawberry she could locate and lifting it carefully by the stalk, she dipped it into her glass of Squampagne for a few moments, both sets of eyes following the trail, engrossed in this act of seduction. 

Something Squernie had vast experience of. This was her forte and she was on a more level paw by this time.

She raised her golden eyes to catch Squirena’s and smiling a big, broad grin she moved the ripe, red fruit swollen with drink oozing from it, over to her delicate, open and waiting mouth. 

The red held her breath in squanticipation of the offering, this was more than just a bite of a fruit, much more and both of them knew it.

Squernie’s breath caught in her throat at the sight of that beautiful mouth sinking into the strawberry, envisaging what she’d love it to be doing to her. 

Once Squirena had taken her initial bite of the delicious, fleshy berry and was carefully licking the sweet juices from her lips, the white took enormous pleasure in finally eating the remains for herself.

They sat back on the cushions, carefully munching the fruit and washing it down with some more Squampagne. 

Squirena took the lead for the next piece and this switching back and forth continued until they had fully sated themselves but had also moved closer still, until their bodies touched from top to toe, fitting perfectly together. 

Just like a Squigsaw Puzzle.

They continued talking about their lives until the setting sun had vanished and the moon had taken its place in the sky. 

They heard the hooting of owls coming out to hunt, bats flying through the fields and trees in search of sustenance. The night sounds were much more relaxing than the daytime noises.

Squernie was just explaining what had occurred in the barn with the Squirrels of Peace and how the sight of her flying past on Squicarus had been the trigger to ensure she got safely out of there.

No way was she going to miss out on this treat tonight, not on your nelly, she told the red.

“I’m so pleased you managed it” breathed Squirena as she carefully leaned forward and once again taking the initiative, because she knew Squernie wouldn’t, she was too nervous to do what she intended to now do, so she tenderly placed her own juice flavoured lips gently onto Squernie’s. 

Someone hummed, neither knew who, both most probably. 

Lips lingering lightly as if both squirrels not wishing to spoil this sublime atmosphere. They parted lips and just rested their heads together staring deeply into the others eyes.

Squernie placed her delicate but strong white paws either side of the fluffy red face, and applied more pressure to her lips this time, groaning out loud with desire, she was aware it was she who’d made the squarousing noise this time.

Squirena responded by grabbing the white fur at the back of her head tightly in her paws and tugged hard, eliciting the exact reaction she was after, while she delved and probed with her tiny but powerful tongue, deeply into Squernie’s mouth.

They eventually parted to get their breathing sorted, neither able to get the broad grins off their lips.

‘Squirena, may I ask you something?’

‘Of course’, the red is quite nervous now, wondering what she was going to ask.

‘You are quite important to me after only a brief time, do you mind if we take things slowly? It’s just, I don’t want to ruin this, as I have a habit of doing just that in my life.’

‘Of course, I have to get this attraction sorted in my own head. Slowly is squexcellent for me.’

‘Ok, great. Would you like to go on a date with me tomorrow?’

‘I’d be delighted to, anywhere nice?’

‘Have you ever heard of Squide? The Squirrel Pride.’

Now go to Story 4

They lay in each other’s arms, snuggling down to snooze in the warm evening air, before going out tomorrow on their date.


	10. The week after Squide

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s the week after Squide and Squernie is trying to top her first date while working.
> 
> After reading this chapter go to Story 5  
> Squovie Night

Chapter 10

Squide had been a resounding success for them both. Squirena enjoying her very first Squide Parade Festival and Squernie had added yet another Iron Squirrel Trophy to her growing collection.

Realising they completely and utterly enjoyed each other’s company over that weekend, they decided that this could be a great relationship for them both, having so much in common with the other. 

Unless of course you count exercise, then they had absolutely nothing in common. 

Squernie was a physical being with a kinetic soul, exercising was what kept her motivated and recharged her energies, while Squirena loathe almost every form of exercise, notice I say almost every form. 

Lifting cups of Squiraz and horizontal exercise were her speciality, as the white will find out later.

While Squernie could run for hours, Squirena could take pleasure for hours on end. 

Unfortunately, being professional squirrels, they both had extremely busy weeks ahead of them; Squernie was not contactable as she was being sent on a secret squission with the Squarmy and Squirena was performing squergeries at the Wyvern Squing of Holby Squospital.

Squernie had been racking her brains for most of the week trying to figure out something to do for their next date. She would be available for the weekend and wanted to arrange an outing for just the two of them to enjoy.

It was whilst on manoeuvres, Squernie had come across a sett in a nearby field, where 3 of the Badger Brothers; Bob, Brian and Bartie Badger had set up an outdoor theatre showing old squovies. 

Obviously a night theatre, due to badgers being nocturnal, it was taking off quite well, but they had their whole cete to contribute help, making it a family business. 

Just in case you didn’t realise badgers form clans called cetes.

Their theatre was aptly named ‘Meles Meles’, specifically because it’s located in Europe.

This weekend there was a squarathon of B squovies, tacky, pseudo-squorror films. In other words, Squirena’s favourites. 

Without thinking about it at all, Squernie books the best spot they have available, secluded, totally private with an oak tree to sit under, along with the premiere package for two squirrels from Friday evening to Sunday evening. Nothing was too good for her and Squirena.

Payment was arranged, now she just had to focus on her mission, get back safely and enjoy. Both of which she had every intention of doing.

Prior to meeting Squirena, the Cosmic White accepted almost all the adventurous missions on offer. She had hated her existence, she couldn’t call it a life really and those few friends she had, Squom and Squetch just about managed to keep her alive.

They used to ask whether she had a death squish, she thought she probably had, up until now.

Now, she was desperate to stay alive, she could see her whole life ahead of her, wrapped tightly around Squirena, if she’d have her.

Squernie’s squission should she choose to accept it was to secretly infiltrate the weasels in the woodlands and destroy the fermented woodlouse stills.

She dressed in her typical black stealth outfit, crossed squords on her back, the only part of her visible was her golden eyes shining through the slit afforded by her headgear.

Fleurticus and her squadron dropped them into the canopy of the trees, then in the shelter of darkness they swept in, planted the explosives and began their egress, before anyone even noticed. 

As they made the rendezvous site, mounted their steeds and the Squagonflies took off, Squernie pressed to detonate switch and boom, one by one, the stills exploded and the riverbank and woodlands lit up like it was Squonfire Night but in August not November.

Delighted with the outcome of the squission, Squernie knew she would get home with plenty of time to spare to get ready and dolled up for the weekend ahead.

Her number one uniform was cleaned and ready to collect from the squartermaster on her return and she spent the afternoon relaxing her mind with the routine of polishing and shining the accoutrements, before she took herself out for a run, had a long relaxing shower and a power nap before getting ready to go and get her girl.

Now go to Story 5 Squovie Night


	11. Squirena’s sulking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Squirena is home and having a pity party for one. So she decides to do something to keep her mind occupied.
> 
> Go to Story 6 - Squo do you think you squ’are

Chapter 11

Squirena had decided that Squernie had well and truly taken control of their past two date weekends and she had thoroughly enjoyed both, well, apart from her pathetic blow out and total paranoia during the first evening of their squovie weekend, that stupidity almost wrecked their whole blossoming relationship.

It’s a bloody good job that Major Wolfe can deal with petulant, drunkenness. Probably never had it directed at her personally, as she herself did, but inordinately practiced at keeping a level head under pressure.

Maybe wearing her uniform had kept Bernie in an emotionally controlled state of mind, it certainly confused her own mental state she had to admit, just the sight of the white in that close fitting jacket and all the associated military accoutrements made her knees tremble. 

Ah, she suddenly realised, that’s where that saying ‘having a knee trembler’ came from.

Any squirrel in their right mind would have fled at the slightest provocation from her own acerbic tongue, history had proven this point on numerous occasions over the years.

She could cause even the strongest of S1’s at the squospital to tremble with just a raising of an eyebrow. Humans have F1’s but squirrels have S1’s in case you were wondering. 

Should her tail suddenly begin to twitch, then woe betide anyone still within her range. She loved teaching and imparting knowledge to junior squoctors, but couldn’t tolerate squidiots or lazy squdents.

She believed her beloved Squiraz, had well and truly been ruined, somehow it had been spiked with essence of dried woodlouse, that’s the only logical reasoning she can find for her despicable behaviour.

She had regularly drunk a vast number of bottles of her favourite wine over the years and had never once had that type of reaction in her life before. 

She doesn’t believe that squove can alter the effects of alcohol on a squirrels behaviour. Mind you she’s unsure whether she’d ever felt or been in squove before. 

The feelings she has whenever she is around Squernie, are something she has never ever felt before and it well and truly scares the living daylights out of her.

She had behaved like a kitten, an immature, unreasonable, spoilt kitten and couldn’t cope with feeling so out of squontrol.

Squmiliating was the primary word that had sprung to the forefront of her mind, Squernie must have thought she’d well and truly lost her mind and gone nuts. 

Thank Squod the other squirrel had been so completely calm, mature and squnderstanding. 

She had been so astonishingly shocked with her own behaviour to be honest, she had apologised profusely to Squernie, but even days later, she somehow felt that matters had changed drastically between them. 

Yes, Squernie had eventually let her reciprocate, it was mind blowingly wonderful and they’d spent the remainder of the last day exploring every millimetre of each other’s bodies, finding out just what made the other twitch, groan and shudder. 

But once the Squagonflies had arrived and brought them back to her tree, Squernie had declined her invitation to stay at the dray with her and had immediately flown off on the back of Fleurticus and she hadn’t seen her since.

She had barely heard from the Cosmic White squirrel, yes, she’d received the obligatory flowers, chocolate gift and a card, probably to assuage her guilt of being accused of just wanting her for squex.

Now that’s just squallowing in self pity you stupid squirrel, she chides herself over and over again. 

If she had acted like an adult, then Major Squerenice Wolfe wouldn’t have left her, alone, self flagellating and remembering her mistake with hurt squide. 

Realisation hit her, that everything currently happening was entirely her own fault, she had caused all her own pain due to insecurity, stupidity and arrogance.

Well it bloody well feels like it now, doesn’t it, she tells herself. You stupid squirrel, you frightened her away, accusing her of all manner of things, now she’s behaving just like you thought. 

She suddenly realised, Squernie is nothing at all like the squarcissist Squedward or potato head Squobbie. 

She also realised she was completely and totally, head over tail in squove with the Cosmic White squirrel.

Holding her head in her paws, she shakes it violently and shouts to the heavens, ‘SQUCK’.

Now go to Story 6 - Squo do you think you squ’are


	12. Squernie has something to do

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Squernie was horrified that something bad could have happened to Squirena.  
> We find out a little more about her job too.
> 
> So now to Story 7 - Squecret Squirrel

Chapter 12

Over the other side of Squolby, in the barracks, Major Squernie Wolfe was once again embroiled in a secret intelligence mission; well that was her area of special interest and one of the things concerning her position in the squarmy she cannot disclose to Squirena.

This bothered her immensely, one thing Squirena had previously told her was that she couldn’t tolerate squiars, she had lived with Squedward Campbell who had squied throughout their whole squarriage and cheated for Britain with whatever tail was prepared to put out, oddly that was a lot to her squrprise.

Squernie had looked into Squedward Campbell’s activities and he was not a nice squirrel at all, Squirena’s daughter was an acorn off the old block, as the saying goes, following in her sire’s sleazy footsteps.

She was not prepared to tell the red exactly what her daughter gets up to, but needless to say it would curl Squirena’s tail without her having to use a roller.

Major Squerenice Wolfe was a top notch Secret Squirrel, SS7, licence to squill. Yes, you’ve got it exactly right, the squirrel equivalent of James Bond 007. 

Only Squernie was way better than him, obviously. Squave, squophisticated and squexy, the one thing they had different though was Squernie did not sleep around

Why was she better? 

Because I said so, i’m writing this and I can make her do or become anything I want, so there, so of course she’s going to be way more spectacular and SQUAB-U-LOUS.

Often sent out on squissions at short notice, prepared to deal with matters of utmost squrgency and prepared to put her life on the line for Queen and Country. 

As well as being a world renowned Trauma Squergeon, this was her main cover in the Squarmy, her other job was to tell totally believable squies for a living, that’s just how it was and the guilt of having to squie to Squirena was gnawing away at her insides.

She was completely wracked with squilt, so much she had began to avoid the red since returning from their weekend, she had begged her Colonel to be able to let her inform Squirena about her position and what she regularly did, but he point blank refused. 

If or once they got married, he informed her, then and only then would she be allowed to tell her squove exactly what she did for a living.

Keeping her distance from the dray and that body was torture she kept communications to a bare minimum, she sent flowers and messages but no visits, she wouldn’t be able to hide her guilt from those beautiful, expressive eyes. 

No matter how brilliant a squy she was, this was one squirrel that squnderstood her completely. She could see through the walls she had erected to keep others away. Just a smile from her could melt the thick ice gathered around her tortured heart.

Yes, she squoved the red squirrel with all her heart and with every white hair on her body. She would do absolutely anything for her and this was another of the reasons she had accepted this secret squission. 

This particular event had actually reared its ugly head over at the Badgers Sett during The Squovie Nights and had almost spoilt her own weekend, it had made her squirlfriend react really badly because of it and she felt like she needed to go undercover to discover exactly who was behind the squiking of the local Squiraz.

This was personal. She was making it bloody personal. 

If Squedward and Squelinor had anything to do with this, she would ensure they paid for it with their squiberty. She would make sure they were squincarcerated in a military squison where they didn’t get all the fancy treatment other squisons offered, they would serve hard labour - breaking walnuts, brazil nuts and all other forms of extremely hard nuts.

These would then get donated to the old squolks homes, where squancient squirrels with no teeth struggle to get their daily nut quota. 

She was especially squangry about the situation since ‘SQ’ (squirrel Q obviously) in the laboratories had advised her that the Squiraz became squoxic once the dried woodlouse was added in high doses and could have squilled anyone who drank it.

Bad enough that a spectacular vintage wine had been ruined, but with the dried woodlouse added, it could have squilled squirrels instantly.

If she had lost Squirena because of some greedy squg dealers she don’t know what she would do, well she did know but it was too scared to actually think of that outcome. 

To calm herself down, she had to sit and squeditate before the red mist took control of her. 

She remembered the breathing techniques Dali Squama had taught her when she had visited the monastery in Squibet. Slowly the pounding behind her eyes abated and she centred and grounded herself.

The mixture was much more lethal than squeroine when mixed with alcohol.

Squirena had been bloody lucky that not all of the bottles she drunk had been tampered with, it was a good job they’d packed quite a few of their own into their basket before leaving and only had one off the Badgers.

Before she left on assignment for a few days, she had arranged for flowers, chocolates and a card to be sent with Fleurticus to Squirena, just so the red realised she did not have any hard feelings about what occurred on the weekend plus to remind the beautiful squirrel she was still in her thoughts.

Who was she kidding, that bloody gorgeous squirrel was constantly on her mind, distracting her and making her emotional. A feeling that was completely alien to her before a month ago.

She had to focus and detach herself from everything if she was going to resolve this case.

Now go to Story 7 - Squecret Squirrel


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The What?

Chapter 13

Squirena decided she had been wallowing in squelf pity for long enough now, so she did what any decent squientist did and that was to focus, so undertaking some research was the perfect thing to do. 

She had been throwing herself wholeheartedly into this task and delved fully into her history, creating their family tree through research, to try and maintain some semblance of normalcy. 

Nothing about the Squirrels of Squolby was ever actually normal, if it wasn’t one thing it was another. 

It would make any author a fortune if they wrote about the goings on here; just like Beatrice Squotter had with all those rabbits and river folks, then Squenid Blyton climbing up that Magic Squaraway Tree.

Hmmm, don’t even contemplate it Campbell, she uttered to herself. You have enough work at the squospital, given someone else a bloody chance. 

Squirena then became distracted from her daydreaming, she tilted one tufted ear to try and focus her senses.

A noise caught her attention, she wondered what that uniquely distinctive noise was just outside her dray, she squinted her little eyes in the bright sunlight, as she pulled the door open.

She had a very slight squangover left, resulting from her continually attempting to drown her ‘Squernie absence sorrow’ with more than a few acorn cups of the nectar that is Squiraz.

She only drank top notch Squiraz, not that cheap, crappy copy of a decent Squine the Badger Brothers tried to fob them off with at the Squovies. 

She remembered she has taken one large sip of the stuff, then threw the swill away, she’d even remembered that acrid taste remained on her tongue for the rest of the day. 

She remembered she’d never felt that bad before, she’d even had bloods taken in work and asked for them to be squanalysed.

Shaking her head, realisation finally dawned on her, she knew squexactly what that noise was.

She dons her squnglasses and slowly saunters outside, swinging those voluptuous hips, then looking up slowly and seductively, locking eyes with the lovely ………. Fleurticus, hovering by the branch of her very own tree. 

No Squernie, her heart plummeted through her feet, her hand clasped her throat. Trying her very best not to let her squevastation show on her crestfallen face. 

Fleurticus, with that tiny Squagonfly face grinning broadly at her, she could see right through the sweetest squirrel she’d ever met and her teeny tiny heart went out to the gorgeous red squirrel stood before her.

Reaching inside her messenger squag she brings forth an envelope exquisitely embossed in pure gold lettering. She did this with such an elaborate flourish and the most exquisitely posh cough, if a cough can be posh, but then the French can make most things sound posh and squexy. 

She opened the envelope and just as she was about to commence reading the paper, Squirena pinched it off her in all the excitement. Mouthing ‘sorry’ as she stepped away from the down draught of her wings. 

Scanning it before rereading, It read,

To: 

The Right Honourable Major Squerenice Wolfe MD, OBE, MM, VC (Plus1).

But she instantly noticed that the plus one had been scratched out and in its place was carefully written: 

Ms. Squirena Campbell MD, MBA.

RSVP to bearer - Immediately.

Opening the envelope she stands there completely squnned. 

Totally squabbergasted to say the least. 

She looked from the invitation to Fleurticus, from Fleurticus to the invitation - so you know how the squenario continues don’t you.

In her beautifully manicured paw she held something that was as rare, if not rarer, than a Cosmic White squirrel. 

An actual invitation to attend His Royal Squirrelness - HRS Squince Charles, 70th month squirthday celebrations. 

The Squince of Wales was holding a garden party at Cardiff Squastle and Squernie wanted to take her along as her plus one. 

Fleurticus raised an eyelid in question to the missive.

‘Oh yes, yes, yes most definitely, yes. Tell her squank you.’

Fleurticus nods, grins and then gets ready to launch.

As Fleurticus flew off, Squirena skipped back along the branch and straight inside her dray.

She held the valuable invitation close to her breast as she waltzed around her living area whilst dreaming of dancing and being held by her BMAS. 

Held in those muscular white arms, while held close against her furry body and wrapped up in the warm embrace of that gorgeous fluffy white tail.

‘What to wear?’ She mused to herself.

Well, she had 2 months in order to prepare, that should be enough time, she hopes. 

Let’s hope she gets to see Squernie before then. The currently elusive Major Squerenice Wolfe. 

Where the squell was she?


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Squirena is in a squandry about the upcoming party and what to wear.  
> Where is Squernie?  
> Why does Squirena feel like she’s being watched?

Chapter 14

As the date of the Squince’s 70th month birthday party quickly approached, Squirena was getting more and more stressed over the matter of Squernie’s sudden and prolonged absence, also what the heck was she going to wear?

She hadn’t even thought about an outfit, did she just buy squomething that would most probably clash with Squernie’s outfit or would she finally get to see her in her military uniform.

Squirena almost dribbling just thinking about the Cosmic White in freshly pressed and polished No.1’s. 

Right. Ahem. Back to her. 

She could call her best friend Squiânie, she’d help, now there was a squirrel who knew how to shop, she could spend acorns for Britain.

Yes, she would arrange a day out with Squiânie, they hadn’t gotten together in quite a few weeks, it would be enormous fun having a day out with her friend and she could do with a sounding board concerning her …….. squove life. 

Right that’s the next few days sorted.

Suddenly her mind flipped back to her lack of …… well, lack of flipping anything right now. 

How could she even contemplate she has or had a squove life. 

Her thoughts suddenly took a darker turn.

What had she possibly done that was so very wrong? Why the prolonged radio silence? She thought they were making positive steps forward, then poof, gone, without a word.

Fleurticus had certainly not led her to believe she’d done anything wrong to ruin their budding relationship, especially when she’d delivered and continues to deliver the gifts from the Cosmic White squirrel and received sincere apologies for the soldiers continuing absence.

She often thought she felt tiny eyes watching over her, as if someone was keeping an eye out for her. Regularly hearing the sound of tiny wings, not that it was rare, they were in the countryside and not far from the river.

Also the Squarmy was located at the other end of the meadow from where her tree was situated.

If she didn’t know any better, she’d have thought the Squagonfly was squying on her, so thought she would take advantage of that fact. 

She had requested they carry a message to Squiânie for her about the much anticipated shopping trip, thinking that they would tell her where to go, but they didn’t. They agreed without a trace of squesitation.

She didn’t really want to ask her pigeon Squicarus as he was getting old, grumpy and actually detested Squiânie with a passion, rarely seen by the quiet, old bird. 

The message would most probably never get to its intended destination if he’d been made to take it, so it was a relief the squagonflies accepted the task.

In reality the little Squagonfly did have a small crush on the red squirrel, but no one was to know that, it could never ever happen but she was just happy that The Major had asked her to keep an eye out for Squirena.

Fleurticus was also squextremely happy to see that the Squirrels for Peace had decided to take her into their inner circle and were keeping her squentertained with researching and social gatherings at her drey.

The reports back from the other Squagonflies and Roxannasaurus especially, told her that despite returning to her previous social butterfly status, the light had dimmed in her normally twinkling eyes.

If news on the wind was anything to go by, the sparkle would soon be back in those tiny black pearls. 

So when Squirena requested they ask Squiânie out on a squirlie shopping trip, they couldn’t wait to comply. 

The twinkle was somewhere in the background and if shopping for an outfit turned it into the trademark sparkle before the White returned, then all the better for everyone involved.

Her current rider was the kindest, most caring squirrel she’d had the pleasure of carrying and being in the Squarmy Squagonflies Squadron she’d carried many.

Underneath her powerful gruff exterior, beats a heart that had been so viciously scared and traumatised by others due to the origins of the Cosmic White (another story for another time), but she was still prepared to accept and give out love unconditionally.

That was why Fleurticus and her Squadron adored the Cosmic White and would do anything for her. 

They were all also beginning to fall madly for their Major’s chosen one. 

Fleurticus was keeping her little crush to herself or so she thought, but she wasn’t as good at hiding her emotions from Roxannasaurus as she thought. More about that later, probably.

The Major under her SS7 persona had dealt with matters over by the riverbank in her trademark way, saving thousands of tiny lives in the process. 

She had recruited many of the locals who knew her and all working together they had solved the matters in double quick time. 

Squernie had always said that if the locals got involved in cleaning up their own area they would take more Squide in keeping it free of crime and trouble.

She was currently debriefing at Squarmy HQ, then as soon as she was finished she would finally be allowed back where she felt she belonged. 

However, this time she wouldn’t be leaving there without a guarantee or they could have her badge and gun. 

She was completely happy to quit the Squecret Service and return to normal military service, especially because she would no longer have to continue to tell squies to her squeetheart.

Squirena had received more than enough attention from rogues in her short life, most of them had been foisted off on her by a domineering dam, hence her current chosen isolation and total immersion into her other squassion, which was her work. 

The vascular squrgery keeps her mind, eye and hands focused and it was the one area of her life she had made her own way in. 

She had a reputation where she took no prisoners, in any quarters, and was a figure to be feared by squdents and colleagues alike.

It was the only way for a female to be in the misogynistic world of Squrgery or so she had thought.

Her squabbatical was coming to an end and she would quickly have to decide what she intended to do. 

Return or squit?

Squirena had been having some lovely thoughts about what she would wear to the event, but kept putting it off and procrastinating because there was no way in squell she would be attending on her own. 

Squiânie had agreed to take her into Cardiff shopping on the weekend, Squirena couldn’t wait to get some squirlie time with her longest friend.

Just as if they had read her mind and to stop her wallowing in self pity, the ‘Peace Gang’ turned up armed to the teeth with her usual tipple of an exquisite Squiraz, some hazelnut beer and a ton of mixed nut pizzas.

Seeing the smiles on their little faces and the gleam of happiness in their eyes, automatically lifted her sullen mood and she threw herself full pelt into party mode.

Oh boy, she was definitely going to have a sore head tomorrow.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Squiânie decides her and Squerena need a break.  
> Squerena gets all maudlin.
> 
> Prequel to The Squopping Trip - Gin Soaked Saga Story 8

Chapter 15

While Squerena partied the night away with Squasha and the gang all lounged about on the sun drenched patio of the red squirrels tree, Squiânie had decided that she most certainly was not going to be going out squopping for the day in Cardiff. 

Oh most definitely not, she thought to herself, especially if her darling best friend, Squerena had eventually made her mind up and was going to finally go all out and get her Cosmic White squirrel, plus there was also the little addition of her getting to meet the actual Squince of Wales. 

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with going squopping in Cardiff ordinarily, nothing whatsoever, so you squirrels from Cardiff kindly don’t get ratty with me, but Squiânie had decided that since she hadn’t had any personal alone time with Squerena in absolutely ages, basically because both squirrels had been so extremely busy in their respective careers and the higher you climbed the less time you had free.

It shouldn’t be that way, but squnfortunately both of them had chosen careers that not only were demanding but promotions actually meant they were required to lead by example and work harder. Most probably why Squiânie was just getting rid of squsband number squive and after Squide had even considered having wife number one.

Squiânie rarely had any time off at all since being made Squblic Prosecutor but she had very recently finished a huge case, one that she had obviously won, so she had demanded a break before taking on the next big case to come her way.

So finally managing to have some time off from her legal duties this weekend she decided to have a blowout, a complete weekend celebration in London; staying in a fabulous Hotel, doing all the squopping ‘til they’re dropping, dining in fine restaurants and attending West End squows, the whole damn lot. 

Why not? They completely deserved it.

She was definitely going to call in a lot of favours for this time away, but she was owed so much by so many squirrels and rarely took advantage of them, plus they could pretend they were back at Squniversity again. 

Well maybe not, but if it wasn’t for the support and friendship of Squerena, she most certainly wouldn’t have had the confidence to become what she had. For that reason alone she believes she owes Squerena a great deal. Squerena on the other hand thinks no such thing, because that’s just what friends do for each other. 

There was just one more final treat she had to sort out before she hit the drey for the night, then she could get her much deserved beauty sleep and could finish off all the other tiny bits tomorrow. 

After putting her phone down for the final time that evening Squiânie sat there with a self squatisfied smile on her little cheeks, then made her way over to her nest for a flipping good night’s sleep.

Back at her own beautiful Oak tree, Squerena had become just a little bit maudlin (as is the norm recently when she’s had a fur full) about Squernie’s sudden vanishing act, that most of the Squirrels of Peace had eventually left for an early night at home rather than fearing they might spill the beans concerning her current whereabouts.

Squerena obviously didn’t realise this was their actual reason for leaving and having squimbibed quite an inordinate amount of Squiraz tonight she was finally left alone, her dainty head resting on Squasha’s broad shoulders, apologising profusely for having upset the gang and scaring them all away. 

It really didn’t matter how many times he reassured her it wasn’t her fault, that they had gone home early for other reasons, she behaved like any other self pitying drunk and almost, I do mean almost, pushed Squasha to the absolute limits of his very long patience, and boy did this squirrel have patience.

Finally, he managed to persuade Squerena to go inside her drey, drink some refreshing, cold, spring water he’d brought up from her own little well out the back of her tree and settle down in the subtle lighting on her plush, moss-filled nest. 

Within a matter of minutes she was out like a light, Squasha bless him, looked tenderly at the worried, almost comatose red squirrel laying prone before him and prayed to Ratatoskr that Squernie would get back from her mission safe and sound, well before Squerena drank the area dry of Squiraz.

That final thought brought a cheery little smile to his caring face and he gently covered her in a blanket, then placed a tender kiss to her brow before leaving.

As he quietly closed the door to her drey behind him, he whispered a good night to the slumbering red, who instantly murmured back:

‘Good night Darling Squernie.’

Squerena woke to the rays of the early morning sun, rising over the fields before her tree and entering the windows of her drey. She felt the warmth penetrating her fur before she even dared risk opening her eyes, one thing she was eternally grateful for was her ability to not get a rotten hangover.

She’d remembered Squasha making her drink the water which always helped to hydrate a squirrel, especially this squirrel. She carefully lifted her head and squinted through half opened eyes. 

Joy of all joys, there was no blinding headache and amazingly no need for her old faithful Squay Bans, her cute button nose began twitching at the amazing scent, that beautiful scent that everyone focuses on after a night on the acorn cups; left-overs, this time it was mixed nut pizzas. She was squalivating just at the thought of it for breakfast.

Eventually she managed to lift herself out of her nest, wash her face to wake herself fully, grabbed a blade of grass from just outside her bathroom window and proceeded to floss her 4 teeth. Then she brushed her fur to remove any knots that may have appeared during the night.

Her mouth no longer tasting like a field mouse nest, you all know that taste after a night out, she went to the kitchenette where she made an infusion of nettles and a blackberry to drink and then rummaged through the boxes someone had kindly stacked on her dining table.

Taking her plate and cup outside, she sat in her comfortable eggshell chair, suspended from the shoot of the branch above and commenced to enjoy her morning meal, wondering what wonderful things would occur today.

She was expecting Squiânie to collect her later to venture out squopping but she became a bit confused at her friends message to get some clothes together ready to go shortly.


End file.
